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Ok, I admit that I've failed somewhere before. But anyway welcome. Just a brief intro on what you should expect here:
1. Football. Not gonna post much of that any soon since season is over. :S
2. Anime, Games, etc. Just abt anything conceivable under the Japanese radar barring anything and everything Rule 34. Now that's illegal. Period. -.-;
3. Music. Everything to do with it is listed under the tab.
5. Unacceptable humour: Anything and everything is fair game here. As long as I don't get rounded up by the ISA. -.-'

6.
The Known World=Fantasy world building in process. I: Used to be glossary, now devoted to random rambling; II: Character Concepts; III: Lore.
7. der Wolf=my Fictionpress account under the moniker Tsumujikaze no Soujutsu. A Ranger's Tale is hosted under this page. :)
8. New section now upped. Maybe I should also gun for upping A Ranger's Tale here since I do have this funny feeling that traffic coming to here is way more than whatever I'll get in FP.

Statement of intent: Everything said here is a figment of personal opinion, be it me or anybody commenting. I try to be responsible, but my parents=/=parents of the world.

@Druid of Luhn: Crap. Should have remembered far earlier to give you the credit for your CSS text box code. :(

A/N: But sadly, it seems that your CSS text box code has now been halved efficiency wise. :(

That most important note I should have added: Any images posted in this blog are NOT my own stuff. I got them from Google image search, I don't earn any shit by being a thief and liar. Those responsible for the pictures, rest assured that you all are great artists in your own regards. Sadly, we all know what limited space means in terms of posting.

Latest Note: Changed alignment for my page widgets due to my worry that I can't centre align the thing.

Note on A Ranger's Tale: In case any complaining fella wants to have a legal case with me, let this be known that A Ranger's Tale is rated M by default. I've upped the swearing and somewhat a bit on the dark/gritty factor. You all have been warned, let no little boy and girl enter the forbidden realm.

Latest on ART: A Ranger's Tale now starting to kick back in gear. But I really hate the insanely fluctuating climate here in S'pore.

P.S: Oh, and one more thing. Vid below is yet another ideal OP for A Ranger's Tale.

Tuesday 24 September 2013

It all started with Bournemouth and an office joke.

Dun like to waste any breath for now, so here's what I mean by office joke. Yeo Ho-nam, White Lotus temple sure got meh?
Yes, the North remembers. So any possibility of Ygritte cosplay? :P

Intro
Every historian in all things Chinese history will tell you that China has 24 official historical texts with the rest considered either of secondary importance (e.g. Chronicles of Hua Yang by Chang Qu) or additional reference (e.g. Zi Zhi Tong Jian by Sima Guang). Note that while Pei Songzhi's annotations should be counted as such, said inclusion actually involves cross referencing and intellectual debate, i.e. this counted as canon.

So what's so special about GCZ (i.e. Great Commander Zhou)? Firstly, this is a much maligned character in reality. I can understand why Cao Cao got PC smeared (well, he's responsible for the Xu Province massacre after all, let alone how Xun Yu became that blood spewing Merlion at Shouchun). But what crime did Zhou Yu commit to warrant an unwanted smear warrant?

To understand how human stupidity works, we must understand that whatever Luo Guanzhong wrote was pure bullshitting. Granted Romance of the Three Kingdoms is considered one of the Four Great Chinese Classics, but we're talking about fiction vs history, idealism vs realism.

Do you think Guan Yu is a righteous son of a gun? Well, he's some son of a gun, but he's anything but righteous.

Do you think Liu Bei is some poor benevolent bastard? Well, he's a bastard alright, but a conniving one.

Do you think Zhao Yun and Zhuge Liang are upright characters? Erm, actually the answer is yes, might as well call one Jon Arryn and the other Eddard Stark.

We must understand that everything in this world starts with supply=demand. The Chinese are quite well versed in $$$ sense, there has always been a massive demand for romanticism. Quite a bit like $$$ grubbing Jews, but idealism wise, we're actually much closer to the Western civilisation, e.g. Arthurian legends and Old Irish mythology. Back during Luo Guanzhong's time, everything was under the Yuan dynasty rule. In Chinese history, there are two specific eras where the big brother upstairs is anything but Chinese. The last imperial age called Qing dynasty (ruled by Manchurians) and the Yuan dynasty (ruled by Mongolians).

Me: Mooncake festival is something started by the rebels in a bid to overthrow the Yuan government lah!

Yeo Ho-nam: You PRC, of course you know one lah!

Me: Eh uncle Yeo, I'm Singaporean lah!

Yeo Ho-nam: Ya lah! I know you everything also know one!

Me: ......

Take note that while this seems like a skit, said event is really true (although I can only remember the overall picture since it's like N months ago). While I'm somewhat incapable of being subtle, the key point is Yuan dynasty. You see, the people were under foreign ownership back then, it's only natural for them to wank on past glory. In short, romanticism on all things loyalty and positive merit became the vogue, no one gave a shit on how someone like Ned can easily roll his head on the ground. To be fair, we cannot judge them and call them stupid. Not because whether PRC or no PRC, but an absolute sense of helplessness caused by prior invasion years ago. In fact, East Asians DO have their bitter history of getting invaded left, right, and centre (although Japan's situation is a bit 50-50 due to military incursions not only into China, but the unified Korea before nation kenna chee).

In short, every race must have some heroes, the Shu Han faction became the tragic blokes (since only God can do this). Wei faction became the primary villain due to Cao Cao's political decision involving the waning Han royalty, Zhou Yu became the primary antagonist in order to make Zhuge Liang sibeh imba.

WTF? That's all? So that means we all kenna bluff by PRC liao lah!
At the risk of sounding anti-PC, my answer is yes. Every person's hero is another's butcher, every man's foe the other party's idol. If you care to understand to how human civilisation works, you'll definitely agree with me. Perhaps Prof Yi Zhongtian sums this up the best:

If the enemy uses trickery to obtain victory, it's called treachery. If the hero uses the same method, it's called being intelligent. In actuality, both are the same.

Thus we must understand the dangers of judging another person. Enough of pseudo-preaching, let's get back on track. Have you ever imagined yourself calling another guy that enviable son of a bitch? Such reaction will surely mean outright jealousy. To quote some explicit examples, maybe just see things this way:

WTF??? THAT COLLEGE LOSER GOT HER AS HIS GF????
OMG!!!! THAT STUPID IDIOT WE BULLIED N YEARS AGO GOT HER AS HIS GF????
NO FAIR!!!! WHY THAT HIGH SCHOOL DROPOUT GOT HER AS HIS GF????
NOOOO!!!!! SEXY LEE GOT TAKEN OFF THE SHELF!!!!*

So what makes Zhou Yu that most enviable S.O.B?

[瑜长壮有姿貌。]
《三国志:周瑜传》

Trans:
[Yu was blessed with good looks.]
《Record of the Three Kingdoms: Account of Zhou Yu》

Fiction-Zhou Yu was born a handsome guy.
Fact-Same as fiction, everything has undergone popular evolution.

[坚子策与瑜同年,独相友善,瑜推道南大宅以舍策,升堂拜母,有无通共。]
《三国志:周瑜传》

Trans:
[Jian's son Ce was of Yu's age, both being close as brothers. Yu allowed Ce to live in his residence at Daonan while paying respect to his (Yu's) mother, no differences were seen between the two.]
《Record of the Three Kingdoms: Account of Zhou Yu》

Fiction-Just like the Shu Han 3 amigos, Zhou Yu and Sun Ce are technically brothers.
Fact-We Chinese have this saying: It takes one hero to values another [英雄惜英雄]. The Japanese actually went one up better [断金の交].

[遂从攻横江、当利,皆拔之。乃渡江击秣陵,破笮融、薛礼。转下湖孰、江乘,进入曲阿。刘繇奔走,而策之众已数万矣。]
《三国志:周瑜传》

Trans:
[Hengjiang and Dangli were conquered with ease via Zhou Yu's military assistance. Hence after, Zhou Yu crossed the river to attack Moling, Ze Rong and Xue Li were routed as a result. Travelling downwards to Hushu and Jiangcheng immediately, Zhou Yu managed to enter Qu'e. Liu Yao escaped in defeat, (Sun) Ce's forces by then had amassed till scores of thousand.]
《Record of the Three Kingdoms: Account of Zhou Yu》

Fiction-Srsly buay chap-siao over whether Luo Guanzhong wrote anything srs on this.
Fact-Having a hand in taking down two major settlements=badass. Took down yet another important settlement while pwning a 2 by 1 handicap=lagi garang. Conquered two more territories=sibeh siao-on. Liu Yao pwned, Sun Ce now a military superpower=LMFAO!!!!!

[策亲自迎瑜,授建威中郎将,即与兵二千人,骑五十匹。

{江表传曰:策又给瑜鼓吹,为治馆舍,赠赐莫与为比。策令曰:“周公瑾英俊异才,与孤有总角之好,骨肉之分。如前在丹杨,发众及船粮以济大事,论德酬功,此未足以报者也。”}

瑜时年二十四,吴中皆呼为周郎。以瑜恩信着于庐江,出备牛渚,后领春谷长。顷之,策欲取荆州,以瑜为中护军,领导江夏太守,从攻皖,拔之。]
《三国志:周瑜传》

Trans:
[Ce welcomed Yu personally, making him the Central General Who Builds The Might. Yu was promptly given two thousand soldiers and fifty cavalry.

{Account of Jiangbiao: Ce also elevated Yu further in order to administer his household, whatever rewards given was more than any other officials. Ce announced thus: "Zhou Gongjin (Gongjin=Zhou Yu's style name) is indeed a perfect talent, he is always close to me like bone to flesh. At Danyang, he sent soldiers and supplies to reinforce our noble cause, whatever bestowed can never equal all he had accomplished for me."}

Yu at that time was twenty four, all in the lands of Wu called him "Youthful Zhou". Via revered repute in his hometown, Lujiang, Zhou Yu set off for Niuzhu, after which he assumed the Chief of Chungu. In order to seize the Jing Province, Sun Ce made Yu Central Protector of the Army while assuming the Governor post for Jiangxia. By assisting Sun Ce, the area of Huan was conquered without difficulty.]
《Record of the Three Kingdoms: Account of Zhou Yu》

Fiction-Same as previous answer.
Fact-People, let us eat our hearts out. Figuratively ofc.

[时得桥公两女,皆国色也。策自纳大桥,瑜纳小桥。

{江表传曰:策从容戏瑜曰:“桥公二女虽流离,得吾二人作婿,亦足为欢。”}]
《三国志:周瑜传》

Trans:
[At that time, Master Qiao married off his two daughters, both of them beauties without peer. Ce chose Da Qiao with Yu marrying Xiao Qiao.

{Account of Jiangbiao: Joking casually with Yu, Ce said: "Master Qiao's two daughters might have forced into exile due to war, yet he's truly blessed to have us as his sons-in-law."}]
《Record of the Three Kingdoms: Account of Zhou Yu》

Fiction-Luo Guanzhong=I buat bodoh
Fact-Eh, musibot Ce! Why u troll every perfectly functioning man?

[复近寻阳,破刘勋,讨江夏,还定豫章、庐陵,留镇巴丘。]
《三国志:周瑜传》

Trans:
[After advancing to Xunyang and vanquishing Liu Xun, Zhou Yu managed to pacify Jiangxia and Luling. Afterwards, he held fort at Baqiu.]
《Record of the Three Kingdoms: Account of Zhou Yu》

Fiction-Luo Guanzhong would rather die than to write down the truth.
Fact-What I've said above serves to reinforce that-which-is-no-contest: Why would Zhou Yu be jealous of others? More likely others were jealous of him.

To be cont'd... (b/c need to kun liao, I need help to curb my potential OCD from 18th Oct to 25th Oct. WHY I CAN'T GO SEOUL WITH LAOBU AND SISTER????? B/C I BOLUI MEH????? I KNO I BLESSED W/POKKAI FACE, WANT TO RELAX A BIT ALSO TAK BOLEH, HAPPY!!!!????)

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