Last minute notice
Due unprecedented circumstances surrounding the current audience range, it's to our heaviest heart that Kork.M.Hancock will be taking a brief hiatus due to possible stress issues resulting from this. Hence we sincerely apologize for any undue disappointment even though it's more likely an undue illusion on our part.
~Rogue Economy Institute
Signed by High Dean, Highest Prof Simisai
Family Values: Stress, Monkeys and Education
So what does the three have to do with family values? Or even more importantly, what does global economy have to do with all of that? To understand the most basic theory, one must understand that economy is based on the people. A lot has been emphasized on the quantity, but not a lot of people understand the importance of quality. This is not to say a chosen elite should take charge, but rather, proper family values is the only way to propel your country's economy unless you truly desired a first world talent pool complete with third world infrastructure.
Stress and Family Values
Firstly, stress is bad for you. Or rather, too much stress is bad for you. Studies have shown that while a higher amount of stress is good for the short term economy boom, a longer term of prosperity is out of question. Global studies for the past decade has shown that countries with greying population are most likely to suffer a manpower crunch, hence the need to ship in or forced to be shipped out. Interestingly enough, such nations will always be forced to turn to technology to sustain their own model, but it's to our most politically incorrect view that such a means will only slow down the rot and not really stop it.
So firstly and foremost, what is the most basic example of stress rage? Allow me to quote an example from my actual experiences with people I don't really know personally:
This one involved a shouting match between two neighbours formerly on good terms. Apparently, what turned everything sour was down to the son of Neighbour A being accidentally groped by Neighbour B's daughter despite they're just twelve year old kids playing around in the playground. Basically, the exchange went like:
A: Oi! Why your daughter touch my son's there, huh? So young become so horny! You be careful ah! Sure one day she will have wrong boyfriend and wrong career as well! You heard of arthouse porno or not?
B: Aye! Don't curse my little girl like that hor! You think you son an angel har? Don't say I gongsuay him hor! Someone like him sure will have slut girlfriend in the uni shooting sex photos and sex videos together for free one lah! Either that or he will push his grandma down the bus and say **** you to the PTO in his blog come the next day!
Of course no one believed the kids involved when they said it's only an accident. This is down to people not bothering to do anything because they have actually done enough by doing their daily neighbourhood report. So should we blame the parents or these honest folks doing their part to maintain the heartlands vibrancy? It's really a chain reaction of sorts.
Firstly, stress makes people do dumb things. On an active basis, it's the two neighbours. Passively wise, it's all those honest folks. To further highlight the former case, apart from President Goldie in part one, what if Alex (name used as a convenience example) actually pushed an elderly lady off the bus despite the latter being somewhat noisy beforehand? Is it truly down to what people tend to call clinical depression? Scarily enough, depression do have a very real relationship with a given society's stress level. It's either you'll start having it, you're already having it or you know you nearing that point. Anything else will just mean you're faking it despite any possible claims otherwise. So what does this have to do with family values? Famous wildlife scientist Charles Daring has this to say:
"If we can liken the animal kingdom with the human kingdom, it means that any given population requires a proportionate amount of birthrate to offset the current and future mortality rate. For human beings, it's all about money to order to purchase all necessity goods. As for the animals, they're actually far more simple with their needs because they don't really understand social stress."
Animals are far simpler than humans in self awareness. Therefore, they don't understand economy, they don't really know stress on an equal level, and they can just reproduce without any worries or fear. Human beings are not so lucky apparently. Abundant future population is needed to sustain and improve your economy, but yet while a mentally unhealthy generation won't destroy a nation, they will actually force the country to a certain compromise. Simply put, it's either they're forced to produce babies similarly dysfunctional or they will just say "**** you and let's emigrate".
On the other had, we have the passive stress. We all know everyone needs to wind down. There are many ways to wind down and that include winding people up. Statistics have show that out of every ten people experiencing a higher level of stress, five of them admitted that they will just choose to shut their brains down. This is not to say that they're contemplating suicide (although studies not-so-recently have proven that the most scary connection really exists), but rather once you start going blank, you just can't hold back. Again, renown South Korean psychologist Eric Jang Guen Soh from part one has something interesting to say:
"The human psyche can be extremely unpredictable. Even unto now, it's still a total mystery yet to be unraveled totally. Let's just say that it's humane nature to find ways in venting stress. For most extreme cases, it will be committing major crimes like murder and inducing grievous bodily harm. On the truly minor majority, it will be committing acts truly senseless from an objective point of view."
So is it equally unlikely for these type of people to have kids? Not so amazingly enough, the answer is yes. Just like the actively stressed, the passively stressed will either have kids equally dysfunctional or just opting to have none at all.
Monkeys and Family Values
In order to ensure a healthy population to sustain a healthy economy, social harmony is extremely important. Surveys have revealed that those people who truly understand what social harmony is like are far more productivity prone, be it at work or in the bedroom. Such parents have proven to be extremely successful in raising up the next generation because... well, they don't really care about urban monkeys stealing random stuff unless it's their own belongings. Interestingly enough, radical moral evolutionist John Cavalier should be quoted here:
"In this world, there are two types of monkeys. The real ones and actual ones. Real monkeys have fur and look nothing like us. Actual monkeys on the other hand, look perfectly like that guy sitting next to me this morning. The former case needs protection. The latter case only requires extermination."
To highlight the possible cold hard truth on what John Cavalier had said, a recent event comes to mind. It truly has something to do with the family values where an international football match had awarded monkey chanters as Men of the Match. So should we call the Men of the Match real monkeys or actual monkeys? No matter what, the natural law will always dictate that you give birth what you sow. Imagine having your country full of such people. Will you dare to say that your own nation can really progress with such blokes as your neighbours and friends? Amazingly enough, a recent population census has actually proven that ninety percent of the people are decently educated. So what truly drove up the surge in devolution? Eric Jang Guen Soh actually pinned the blame on Mad Sheep Disease where it's perfectly cool for someone to follow something officially cool. And there's nothing uncool over things your peers think is cool. So that will pretty mean the only cool foreigner is an investing foreigner, not a passing foreigner. Of course in order to have a foreign investor, you must let such people pass you by on the streets and not just on the football pitch. On a perfectly unrelated note, the Chairman of the United European Football Association International League (abbrev: UEFAIL) has this to say:
"I, Chairman of the UEFAIL, Michael Pagoli, will always officially condemn such acts of indiscriminate stupidity far more dire than Nicole Bender flashing her G-string underwear in a ladies football tournament match despite the brand in question not being part of the official sponsors.ship. Therefore, it is to UEFAIL's utmost concern that we must enforce an allocation of thirty percent in match tickets for every deserving black fan."
Education and Family Values
So how do a nation raise its game in the global economy? Education is something truly imperative here. But yet, education is all about your educators and actual family. Let me first dissect the former.
Global statistics have revealed that a proper educator industry is a pivotal means to equip the future generations for the future economy. Which is why there will always be teaching scandals every now and then. If we are to define the term teaching scandal, there are actually two definitions.
1. Educators who got the sack because they posted something naughty online.
2. Educators who got the sack because they do something naughty in reality.
Case 1 will always ensure future career opportunities apart from being an educator while Case 2 can cripple a country's economy for good if left unchecked. So let's just dissect Case 2 because that's the truly important one. Now we all understand teaching ethics and once you broke the law, you only have two paths. Either the police throw you into the slammer or you'll end up on the run. The first path is far easier to implement, but yet that will also mean the country itself would have to forsake a relevant number of years where anyone can contribute to his own country's economy instead. Second path will require certain brains so that you can fly out of your country within a day's notice. That will be even worse because it will mean one available manpower gone for good.
In fact, there's an article a few years back concerning an ex-counselor going by the name of Michael Ser Teng Dong. To summarize up the case, Michael Ser was actually suspected of causing an unwanted pregnancy in one of his female students, hence forcing the girl to undertake an abortion. That was actually before his supposed act was outed. Immediately after the news broke out, Michael Ser was certified to have "left the country", but only after he had tendered his resignation letter. The case caused a major uproar for quite some time, but after a few years, Michael Ser again hogged the headlines for all the wrong reasons. Or correct reason in fact depending on your own mileage.
You see, after making his clean escape, he took up teaching again without any major scandals erupting. That was until he contacted AIDS and dismissed by the school immediately afterwards. Perhaps not so surprisingly, the online media started to go overdrive mode where NOT only the aforementioned article had resurfaced, but at the same time girls claiming to be his ex-students were accusing him of fingering crimes. The most ironic fact? He didn't die of STD. He was shot dead by the local police officers when he tried to abduct a twelve year old girl for reasons he himself only knew about.
So try to imagine this what-if scenario: What if Michael Ser Teng Dong had never gave in to his urges? Will it mean that he would have still been teaching and contributing to his nation's overall economy? Your guess is as good as mine.
So now let's move onto the family aspect. Hereon, I'll invoke a finding compiled by my fellow colleague Benedict "Dict" Siew Hoon Kee:
"In the parentage world, there are two kinds of mothers and two kinds of fathers. Tiger Mama and Wolf Mama, Dragon Papa and Bear Papa. Tiger Mama and Dragon Papa form one pair of the equation with Wolf Mama and Bear Papa forming the other half. Those known to have either a Tiger Mama or Dragon Papa are more prone to having a one night stand per week while those educated by both actually have a major tendency to self record their own sex videos and shoot their own sex photos. As for the rest, they're the ones having a Bear Papa and a Wolf Mama. These are the kind of children who will never kill kittens or bully their fellow human beings into submission."
In addition, I'll also like to share with you my findings on the most critically acclaimed novelist alive:
Enal Alex Dumbas was a constant victim of schoolyard bullies mainly due to his mother Annie being a single parent. After a near successful attempt at suicide, his school just decided to expel him because it's actually bad for the institute's own personal reputation should the news really leak out. Left with no money apart from whatever little they had, Annie Dumbas opted to move in with a settlement of indigenous tribes. It was around then where Annie shared her own findings on wolves with young Enal Alex. Despite being reviled all over the society, young Enal Alex actually discovered that wolves will always be extremely protective towards their young despite only the Alpha male having the breeding rights. Interesting enough, cubs raised this way would always be capable pack leaders in their own right.
At the time of this article, Enal Alex Dumbas has became a best selling author just behind E.Greymatter, author of the Fifteen Shady Cycle. Yet, it's pretty much noteworthy that his running novel series "The Three Bucaneers" actually have current literature greats like Bran "The Heir" Anderson, Goodkind "Saint of Satire" Pratchett and J.R.R "That Troll God" Martin singing his praises. And this is truly something unheard of for the past decade or so. In fact, I'll like to hammer home the truth that his own self written biography has created an uproar due to certain events exposed deemed as controversial. To have an idea on what caused uproar, let me make known the official stance coming from a leading parenting group called Parentage United Symphony (abbrev: PUS). Basically, it goes something like:
1. Our kids will never commit such an act. Dumbas' a liar.
2. Our kids are law abiding citizens and we don't care what Dumbas says.
3. Dumbas' mom is a single mother. Can his words be trusted?
But yet, seven out of ten underprivileged children or victims of schoolyard bullying actually admired Enal Alex Dumbas for who he truly is while the remaining three out of ten have stated their desires to truly become the next Enal Alex Dumbas. To add up the sum of figures, that will mean ten out of ten. Interestingly enough, major social media actually ended up having a spike of anti-Enal Alex Dumbas bashing with Twatter, Tumble, FartBook and Yolotube being the most notable social media brands in this very context. Enal Alex Dumbas' reaction? I think I can just conclude this article by this quote of his upon being asked of such a question by a curious journalist:
"The gods will never play with the mortals. After all, you can't expect mortals to improve a country's economy and this is me being actually kind enough."
Wow! Great work!
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