1. Cao Cao obtained many vassals from the newly surrendered Jing faction.
2. Said surrender was down to Liu Biao's demise.
3. Said useless bugger's death caused quite a bit of family drama. In short, history is full of succession wars. Who say we Chinese more civilised? Def not me.
4. By seizing control of Jing Province, Cao Cao had successfully created a terrain lockdown on Jiangdong. This was down to the Yangtze River being the only major passage into the Wu lands.
5. In short, Cao Cao could now easily deploy naval fleets in numbers with land forces deployed separately. No prizes for guessing correctly how he would go about doing it.
How footie makes its return here
1. Cao Cao obtained many vassals from the newly surrendered Jing faction=Rival clubs now got sugar daddy and sugar $$$, therefore $$$ can buy you many things.
2. Said surrender was down to Liu Biao's demise=Français, Deutsch, Español, русский... the list goes on, but if your owner is English/Irish/Scot, it doesn't really matter if he's truly stupid and inept.
3. In short, history is full of succession wars=chairman makes controversial decision=fans declare crusade plus St George's flag.
4. Terrain lockdown=piss poor home form with too little 3 pts won.
5. No prizes for guessing correctly how he would go about doing it=No prizes for guessing correctly the answer.
How to have a Midas touch w/o turning living humans into non-living statues
[江夏太守黄祖遣将邓龙将兵数千人入柴桑，瑜追讨击，生虏龙送吴。]
Trans:
[The Grand Administrator of Jiangxia, Huang Zu, sent his general Deng Long and few thousand men to invade Chaisang. Yu managed to stage swift attacks in response. As a result, Deng Long was captured and sent to Wu.]
The Cock Talks Back-No, this is much earlier than Cao Cao's conquest b/c Liu Biao was still alive then. In fact, Huang Zu croaked earlier than Liu Biao. More on that later on. Crucial key lies in staging a swift break and counter. Granted every team knows how to do that, so Mogga says...
"Oi! Hatam lah angau! Empat, lima! Empat, lima! All lads forward first, then counter whack!"
Local bastard says:
Most ideal situation=When opponent decides to do an Eddie Howe
Most ideal opponent=90% of the Championship
[时曹公军众已有疾病，初一交战，公军败退，引次江北。]
Trans:
[At that time, the Cao forces were already afflicted with pestilence, hence Cao Cao experiencing defeat and retreating till Jiangbei.]
The Cock Talks Back-This time round, 'tis round 1, fight! Why Cao Cao lost was down to his men reduced to quarter-men. Zhou Yu sensed an opening, Cao Cao kenna whack. Since I'm a geek, I'm proud to say that the shark and piranhas finally sensed some blood. No prizes for guessing the end result.
Mogga says:
"Oi! Forward, forward! Bey jiak-peng issit? Longzong chiongsua!!!!"
Local bastard says:
Most ideal situation=kosong-kosong
Most ideal opponent=Advanced backline, not necessary quality.
[瑜等在南岸。]
Trans:
[Yu waited at the southern coast.]
The Cock Talks Back-#TeamJiangdong 1, #TeamCaoWei 0. No point pressure play recklessly since #TeamCaoWei still holds the numerical advantage. Not to mention Cao Cao=BA military talent.
Mogga says:
"Steady, steady! Scally they lobo bomb forward how? Got time, got time! They sure think we want to score 2nd goal, we score 2 more for them to see!"
Local bastard says:
Most ideal situation=opponent manages to rally everyone apart from us and the rest. Yes, I'm talking about every lion's den bar our own unless we only have quarter turnout. Then we sure tongkeng liao.
Most ideal opponent=Motivational speaker by profession, moonlighting as football manager.
[时风盛猛，悉延烧岸上营落。顷之。烟炎张天，人马烧溺死者甚众，军遂败退，还保南郡。]
Trans:
[The wind was blowing fiercely at that time, the fire even reached unto the coastal encampment. Smoke and fire rose till the sky, many were those either burnt to death or drowned. The enemy was forced to beat a retreat in order to protect Nanjun.]
The Cock Talks Back-We only lead 1-0, but our fans triple the score even before the fat lady sings.
Mogga says:
"Satu kosong tak bagus! Satu kosong tak boleh! The fans all want to drink teh-kosong liao! Must give them best of the best teh-kosong! Plus kopi-kosong also!"
Local bastard says:
Most ideal situation=What the Cock talks above.
Most ideal opponent=Any takers? Any comers?
[兵未交锋，瑜即遣甘宁前据夷陵。]
Trans:
[Before both forces engaged combat, Yu sent Gan Ning promptly to occupy Yiling.]
The Cock Talks Back-Standstill post HT, maybe like only 10 mins to go. Correct Man vs Incorrect Score, all possibilities apply.
Mogga says:
"KNN! Longzong pack across the middle! Want to play HC issit? Let you HC ppl jiak lead!"
Local bastard says:
Most ideal situation=90 min shutdown. Worst come to worst, the other lobo leading 1-0, close shop.
Most ideal opponent=Italian fortress and army owned by Italian aristocracy. Because they all Roman military, we the Boro merely Gaelic lancers on foot.
[仁分兵骑别攻围宁。宁告急于瑜。瑜用吕蒙计，留凌统以守其后，身与蒙上救宁。宁围既解，乃渡屯北岸，克期大战。]
Trans:
[Ren diverted part of his forces to attack Ning who sent a message to Yu calling for urgent help. Yu used Lu Meng's plan to leave Ling Tong behind while riding with Meng to save Ning. The siege was swiftly lifted and Ning was freed. Stationing himself on the northern bank, Ning prepared for the battle to come.]
The Cock Talks Back-Correct bloke scores, opponent press forward. With nowhere to hide, escape is never an option. Not that House Stark will despair for long anyway. Parity secured, cannot rely on Brynden Tully alone. Thankfully, House Stark not 100% destroyed. Sansa Stark remembers, Littlefinger knows nothing.
Mogga says:
"Enemy at the gates! Secure the middle, win the ball! Retain possession, strike with precision, seize back what is ours with steel and fire! Butterfield! Adomah! Kamara! Emnes and Muzzy! Where the **** are all of you?"
Local bastard says:
Most ideal situation=Any worst possible situation
Most ideal opponent=There must always be a Stark in Winterfell first...
[瑜亲跨马㧰陈，会流矢中右胁，疮甚，便还。后仁闻瑜卧未起，勒兵就陈。瑜乃自兴，案行军营，激扬吏士，仁由是遂退。]
Trans:
[Yu personally led his men when an arrow struck him on the right rib. Injured, he was forced to retreat. When Ren heard word of Yu bedridden and incapacitated, he mustered his forces for attack. Yu promptly braced himself together, his presence in the camp invigorating morale. Upon seeing this, Ren decided to retreat.]
The Cock Talks Back-When all things fail and there's still chance of getting a point or 3, we still have Mogga.
Mogga says:
Local bastard says:
Most ideal situation=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbqnBBBeWNI
Most ideal opponent=all 46 others
And since I'm foreseeing the end...
To be cont'd.... (and may there truly be a Stark for Winterfell)
No comments:
Post a Comment